Its Joke Time!!

So I’ve been working on some new material for a while. Here is a sneak preview of my always hilarious jokes!! HaHa (not so much)

 What’s the difference between chopped beef and pea soup?
Everyone can chop beef, but not everyone can pea soup!

Why don’t aliens eat clowns.
Because they taste funny.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino?
el-if-i-no

Two peanuts walk into a bar.
One was a salted.

What do you call a deer with no eyes ?
I have no I-Deer

What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop

What did the rug say to the floor?
Don’t move, I’ve got you covered.

And here are some of my favorite jokes…

What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?
Her New Jersey.

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on the floor? Matt

What do you call a lady with one leg?     ILeen

Where does the lady with one leg work? Ihop

How do we know that Indians were in America first? They had reservations

Why does Snoop Dogg cary and umbrella? Fo Drizzle

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe?  Ruberto

Why didn’t the teddy Bear eat dinner? He was already stuffed.

And everyones favorite…PIRATE JOKES!!

Who cooks for Pirates on the Pirate ship? Chef-boy-aaaaaaaaaar-D

How much did the Pirate pay to get his ear pierced? A buck an ear                        

Where do most Pirates come from? AAAAruba

Why are Pirate jokes so funny? Because they AAAAR!